With Or Without You.

This is not who I am

brooding, pensive, staring out at the sky.

This isn't me

clutching the past to my heart like a teddy bear

not wanting to let go.

My eyes cloud easily; at the drop of a hat

I can't see what's in the distance

I want to be a child again

holding balloons, playing catch-and-cook

without a care in the world.

I'm wearing a pretty veil

and a suit of chain-mail

when all I want to do

is rip them all off

and sit in a corner; and cry.

You're there in my dreams all the time

I hold you to myself like a teddy bear

not wanting to let go, ever.

But when I open my eyes

there's just an empty space beside me.

Tears never came easily to me

but today, I dont know whats wrong...

It hit me real hard that day

and I found the answers to all my questions

It's frightening. It is, really.

Set me free from this maelstrom of emotions that I live in

I'm drowning

and I don't want to be in it anymore.

This is not who I am,

insomniac, dreamer, future-wedding-planner.

This is not me.

I don't read love stories

I don't watch sobfests that make my heart ache;

you made me.

Your imperfect world

makes me dream of a perfect one for myself

even if it's not who I am.

Who is the real me, then?
"Wondering why we bother with love, if it never lasts..."